Perception Sometimes Sucks

We all see ourselves in a certain way, and I don't think I'm so different from anyone else in this regard.  I think I'm a pretty nice guy, a good father, a loyal friend.  I try to have fun when I can and I'm a professional at work.  I always look for common ground when meeting new people and almost always have a smile on my face.  I'm no star athlete, not the best looking guy in the room, and can be kind of absent-minded at times, but I won't steal your wallet or your girlfriend (unless you leave one or both on my bed).

Why then, do others see me so differently?  Here are a few vignettes from the past few years that still have me scratching my head;

I'm a Partner at a Management Consulting firm, where I work with our clients' top corporate leadership on important issues like strategic planning, governance, mergers and acquisitions, and a slew of other problems.  I'm pretty good at it too.  When there's a tough problem to solve, I tend to approach it head on, which I think is a good thing.  At least its effective and the clients seem to be pretty happy with the results.  Now, I AM originally from South Philadelphia, and most of my family is still in the area, but I haven't lived there since I was 10.  There's no sugar-coating it, I grew up around a few gangsters.  However, I am NOT a gangster.  Really, ask anyone who knows me and they'll tell you .  I'm a legitimate businessman.

I thought I had made the distinction until a few months ago when I walked into a meeting with my Partners at work.  They were looking at a news article about a series of organized crime arrests in New York.  They asked me if I'd heard about the arrests and wanted to know if any of the guys who got locked up.  Now this wouldn't be so bad, except that night I went over to my girlfriend's house.  When I got there she was watching the news and when the story came on, she turned to me, smiled, and said "Hey! any of those guys your cousins?"

A couple of weeks later, I'm laying in bed at 1am waiting for my girlfriend to finish the "potions and lotions" phase of her pre-bedtime ritual.  I'm almost certain said ritual involves a wand at some point, but as of this writing, I have been excluded from witnessing what the hell goes on in there for an hour.  Anyway, I'm laying in bed.  Waiting.  For an hour.  During the entire time I'm waiting I was trying to read my kindle to pass the time, but a helicopter was flying very low over the neighborhood making a huge racket.  I mean it made my teeth tingle, it was that low.  The damn thing would circle overhead, go off a mile or tow, and then return.  Finally, after the "potions and lotions" hour had ended, my girlfriend walks out of the bathroom, looks right at me, and in a voice loud enough to be heard of the helicopter racket said "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WILL YOU PLEASE GO OUTSIDE AND PUT YOUR HANDS UP?  THEY'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU FOR AN HOUR!"